A while back I added Redefining Life to the title.

Why did I do this?  Simple.  I want to help Women change the way they look at living with PMDD.  Really, to change the way Women look at living with any invisible disorder.  What I mean by invisible is that friends, family and coworkers can’t ‘see’ PMDD.  It’s not like a broken bone, or a scratch on your face, it’s much worse because there isn’t anything physical to show outsiders to help them understand.

One thing is for sure, it is debilitating, painful, and downright horrible unless it’s managed.

Unfortunately, managing PMDD isn’t simple, you can’t pop a magic pill, you can’t sleep it off, and you sure as heck can’t just ignore it.

To redefine your life with PMDD, or any other disorder/syndrome, you must look at what triggers make you worse.  It can be foods, certain exercises, stress, lack of sleep, too much junk food or caffeine, you get the picture.

SO, hold on to your socks!  This site is no longer going to just talk about PMDD, though obviously that will still be a major part.  I am now going to be adding new info to this site now to help you redefine your life.

Foods and recipes that can help you relieve some of your pain (physically& emotionally).

Recipes! Yummy, my favorite.  I really do enjoy cooking, for my family and friends, but I see what certain foods do to me.  Yes, I had my hysterectomy in Feb. which relieved my PMDD symptoms, however, I  also have IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome) and I am lactose intolerant.  So, food still plays an important role in my life, or I pay the price.

In addition to recipes, I will display pics of the final meal and post which cookbooks I use and why.  All of my recipes will not be lactose-free, no one else in my family deals with this so a lot of times I will cook them something scrumptious that includes cheese or dairy products.

Exercises that won’t make you feel worse.  Keep an eye out for more videos by me and awesome one’s I find online that I have tried.

More parenting tips and tricks when dealing with PMDD

and so much more!

What are you doing right now to redefine your life?

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Hey guys.

I have my computer set up so that whenever anything regarding PMDD/PMS goes around on the Internet it lets me know.  I can keep up with the ‘latest and greatest’ if you will on research and studies.

What I have come across this past week are a couple of sites on PMDD, they ask questions that sound very general and laid back.  One question I am seeing a lot is, “any other Women have PMDD, please answer these questions.”  It makes it look as though they may have PMDD and just need help.  Most of you are like me and want to spread the word and help, however, when I look deeper into the sites for a contact, stories, etc… I find nothing.

So, just keep in mind not all sites are created equal.  Make sure you know who you are sharing your story with and what they will be doing with it.

Stef, PMDD Advocate & Coach

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I am still offering PMDD Companion Services for anyone that is interested.

My goal is to support you and encourage healthier behaviors during your 1-2 week PMDD ‘hell’ times. To work with you, putting into action necessary tools & techniques to live happier and healthier, even with your PMDD. Work through problems as they occur so that you can learn to do it on your own, not depend on others, including me.

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OK ladies,

As I said above, I am stepping up the game here at Redefining Life w/ PMDD Network~! I am adding an accountability section, and YES! I expect everyone to participate. :)
You will benefit from this if you do, I promise.

I have said it over and over again, you can NOT just pop some magic pill to cure PMDD, there isn’t a pill and there isn’t a ‘cure’ though some have had incredible results from a hysterectomy, others not so much.

You MUST take care of yourself and while it may not seem ‘fair’, it is what it is.  We need exercise daily, if not daily then start with 3x/week, adequate amount of sleep, healthy diet, vitamins & for some medication.

I am adding a daily and a weekly accountability section, under the healthier living category.  If it’s too hard for you to remember what you did, how long and when, print a calendar and mark it.

Goal: Workout at least 3x/week, post what you did (no matter how small), how long you did the activity, and when.

I WILL be keeping a printed chart of this to make it easier for me to keep up with all of you, individually.  I mean business here, ladies. :)

Again, doesn’t matter how big or small the physical activity is, it’s about getting up off that couch and doing it.  I will also be posting ideas for anyone that needs a little help along the way.

C’mon ladies, let’s give that PMDD a punch in the face!

Reply to this if you plan on joining in the fun!

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I know in my household I am the one that makes doctors/dentists appointments, not for just myself and my 4 kiddos, but also my husband.  Not just appointments, but if any meds are needed, I distribute, if follow ups are demanded, I make sure they are met.

I make sure my husband gets in for a yearly check up, just like me- Oh yeah, he’s so lucky, isn’t he! :)

This is a great article about how Women are the healers, the one’s that keep the family (& a lot of the times relatives), healthy.
I’m proud to be one that watches over my family and their health.

Make sure you are watching over your family and make sure you are teaching them healthy habits now.

Lady Madonna
By Jeffrey Kluger Thursday, Apr. 15, 201
www.time.com

A sudden interruption turned what started as a routine press conference into a revealing anthropological dance. Health and Human Services (HHS) Secretary Kathleen Sebelius was addressing the media when NBC newscaster Chuck Todd loudly sneezed — a scary sound in a crowded room during the H1N1 flu pandemic one day last September.

“Bless you,” Sebelius said. Then she did a double take and widened her eyes in reproach, an expression anyone who ever had a teacher or a mother recognizes — and fears. Todd had sneezed into his hand rather than using the approved into-the-elbow method for limiting flu transmission. “What is that about?” Sebelius asked sternly and then demonstrated the proper technique. “We’ll have to get Elmo to give Chuck a special briefing,” she added, a reference to a Sesame Street ad that shows kids how to sneeze hygienically.

The Cabinet Secretary was kidding — mostly — but Todd’s red face and uneasy squirming looked awfully real. And while the newsman might have reacted the same way if he’d been called out by Mike Leavitt or Tommy Thompson or any of the other male HHS Secretaries who came before Sebelius, it’s hard to picture. For humans, there has always been something about a health message coming from a woman that gives it special authority. The father may traditionally have been the head of the home — and the family doctor may traditionally have been male — but it was the mother who saw to it that the kids got vaccinated, Grandma made it to her heart specialist and Dad stayed on his blood-pressure meds. And while much about family life has changed over the decades, that part hasn’t.

Women make the primary health care decisions in two-thirds of American households. They account for 80 cents out of every dollar spent in drugstores and are likelier than men to choose the family’s health insurance. Even when both parents work, wives shoulder 75% of domestic responsibilities, including making the kids’ doctor appointments and getting them there on time. “Women are the main brokers of health care in the United States,” says Dr. William Norcross, a family physician and faculty member at the University of California, San Diego, School of Medicine. “This has long been the case and is probably true elsewhere in the world too.”

It is, and the rule is not limited to mothers. In the 1990s, when Nepalese children faced an epidemic of vitamin-A deficiency, which can be deadly, and health experts needed someone to help distribute supplements, they recruited the nation’s grandmothers, knowing they had both the time to get the pills out and the moral authority to make sure kids took them. By 2005, 48,000 grandmothers were distributing vitamin A to 3.5 million kids.

“Global development agencies are cuing into this kind of thing too,” says anthropologist Sarah Blaffer Hrdy of the University of California at Davis. “When you give resources or money to women, more winds up in children’s health. When you give it to men, it’s likelier to wind up going for things like tobacco.”

There are a lot of variables that explain the mom-as-health-czar phenomenon. As with so many things, it begins with evolution, but it doesn’t stop there. Females of nearly all species expend far more time and energy producing young than males do and are thus far more motivated to protect that investment. “I could count on two hands the number of species in which males are primary caregivers,” says Hrdy.

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Hello. I wanted to update you on the pain issue. I still don’t know what’s going on, but I’m really thinking it might not be endo as I can get rid of the feeling with some specific yoga moves, massage, and a change of position. I am working hard on maintaining a positive attitude right now. I may not know how to control the pain totally, but I do have total control over the thoughts I hold. So, instead of feeling like I will never feel better, I am thinking that my health is being restored. Further, each effort I make to feel better is being viewed as a step on the path to restoring my health. I might not know exactly how restored health is going to happen, but I know this: I am finished with illness. I don’t care if I get some new diagnosis to add to the list of diseases and syndromes and disorders I’ve been racking up since 2006. I AM STILL  FINISHED WITH ILLNESS. Again, no matter what is going on in my body, right now, PMDD free and totally sane, I have total control over my thoughts. I am using them wisely.

I have grown very tired of doctors offices and so am trying some alternative approaches. I had my first acupuncture treatment last Sunday. So strange. The needles didn’t hurt at all but I suggest you hold very still after they are in. I made the mistake of arching my back a little and then one spot hurt a lot.

Within two minutes of having the needles placed I was bawling face down in the little massage table face holder thingy. No tissue to be found and the acupuncturist had left for a little while. I couldn’t blow my nose or wipe my eyes. I just watched the tears fall down to the carpet. It felt so good to cry. It was a tremendous release. I guess it’s common to cry with this procedure (have any of you had acupuncture?).

I did feel better after I left the wellness center. Not 100%, but better. And I haven’t had a day that has made me cry from pain since going there on Sunday. I’ll continue trying it for a little while and let you know how it goes. I haven’t made it this far to give up on myself and a healthy body!

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I haven’t ever done this before. I have a friend that I have known since elementary school. She is a single mother, works from home doing photography and has a band. She’s one of those people that would take the shirt off of her back and give it to you to help you, leaving herself shirtless, if you know what I mean.

She’s just a great person. Anyway, her band will get some incredible coverage if they win this contest. Here’s a little excerpt about her band: Whether your looking for a small size dance band, or in need of a full 10 member horn band, ZuZu Peddals offers 6 up to 10 musicians for your event & budget!

About Her: *Former “Victoria Valiantette” with Vince Vance & The Valiants 1993-2001~ Full time single mom~ Child photography~ Web design~ Singer on the cartoon “Blue gender” as seen on Cartoon Network, and Owner/singer of ZuZu Peddals

You do have to sign up, but it’s free, I just use my freebie account that I use for stuff like this. It took me literally less than 2 minutes, it doesn’t ask for a ton of info like some subscriptions, just the quick stuff.

After you sign up, go to your email and click the link to verify it. It will take you back to the site, click on Entertainment, then click on ZuZu Peddals. If you don’t see ZuZu Peddals yet, click on Weddings and then you will see it.

I can’t thank you all enough. I just love supporting other Moms and helping them be able to raise their kids while still doing what they love to do. Even more, she is an incredible person.

Please don’t forget to vote for my band in the 2009 WFAA’s Best Entertainment in Dallas! We are in the TOP 5 right now!!!!! http://alist.wfaa.com/zuzu-peddals/biz/302709

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One day, after I was trying to recover from almost killing myself  (remember how I said I can’t take anti-depressants because they make me suicidal?), I sat in a counselor’s office listening to him talk about waves. He said that when we are fighting against ourselves or something we don’t like, we can imagine ourselves being caught in a wave and trying to somehow control it.

At the time, my particular wave included trying to resist or gain control over lots of somethings I didn’t like. I was mad at myself for listening to a psychiatrist instead of myself. I was mad that my psychiatrist hadn’t listened to me (um, I think the meds are making my PMS worse & that my moods seem to be connected to my periods), and that this lack of listening had contributed to me almost dying. I was mad about trying another med when in my gut I knew I was having a bad reaction to meds. In the case of the horrible August day, I had found myself packing every medication I had for an overdose. I had gotten to the point of planning to commit suicide during the week before my period was about to start while I was simultaneously being told to increase a new med – Effexor. I was feeling really guilty about wanting to kill myself months ago when I had a little boy to think about (I did manage to drive myself to the university counseling center instead of going through with it). I was new to PMDD. I was angry. I felt so very, very out of control.

My wave felt huge.

The counselor began to describe the anatomy of a wave and suggested that when I felt like struggling, I try remembering that a wave cannot last. It has a beginning and an end. He suggested that I might want to imagine hanging out in the trough, the bottom of the wave, instead of trying to stop  it.  I pictured myself in this scooped out portion of everything I was trying to fix and it made me feel better. What if I cut myself some slack and just let it be what it was without trying to take action, knowing that it couldn’t last? Sure, I could try some coping strategies or counseling, but could I really expect myself to fix so many enormous and complicated emotions and events, to undo things that couldn’t be undone? Well I could. I did. But that wasn’t working very well.

I spoke with my mom about the idea of lying in the trough. She said when she was a little girl she swam out too far and was caught up in the tide. She recalled struggling and then allowing herself to simply roll on the bottom of the ocean. Before very long, she found herself rolled right onto the beach, safe again.

Tell me about your wave.

Tell me about what it feels like to lie in the trough.

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Last week I went to the DMV to get new tags because MY BIRTHDAY IS  JUNE 2nd :0) As I stood behind my car, trying to get the JUNE sticker onto the plate, I noticed the woman beside me doing the same. And just before I thought, She’s having a birthday soon, she turned to me and said Happy Birthday! I wished her a happy birthday too with one of my big goofy crooked smiles.

I crave moments like that, when strangers reach out to me and suddenly I feel more connected to the world. I love spontaneous moments of kindness. I also like to have a birthday week versus a birthDAY, so it was a good start to my kind of celebrating.

There is so much that has happened, that has come before my 36th year. I am so grateful that I have survived it all and learned from it. My birthday wish for myself is that my 36th year is about living the life I’ve been imagining instead of spending so much time, well, imagining… and to live it with grace, even when grace for me might look a little disheveled and lumpy sometimes (for example, you may be thinking Jennifer sounds so positive when really I was crying earlier because I didn’t feel positive at all). I guess I’m trying to say I am done waiting for the perfect moment and for the perfect me. My perfect moment and the perfect me is now. It always has been. I just didn’t recognize it.

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